Monday, August 3, 2009

I feel like this guy....

I am sooo tired this morning. I ended up taking a nap yesterday afternoon, but it wasn't even that long of a nap. Regardless, I still couldn't fall asleep last night. I was restless and when I did finally fall asleep I kept having very vivid dreams that would wake me up. I'm not sure what was wrong, but I kept thinking about my life and the choices that I've made. I want to know that I'm making the right decisions to take my life in the direction I want it to go, but sometimes I start questioning myself. I know that "S" and I weren't right for each other, but I started thinking about why I would give up a relationship with someone that truly loves me and would probably have married me and had kids with me down the road. And then I get mad at myself because I want those things but not at the expense of being in a relationship that isn't giving me what I need. I know it was the right decision to end things, but last night I just kept going over and over it in my head. I'm only 24, but I kept thinking about how hard it is to find the "right" person and how I know of many people in their 30's and 40's that never have. Maybe my expectations aren't realistic. Maybe there isn't "the one." I actually believe that each person has many soul mates and that there isn't only one right person for everyone, but I keep thinking maybe I was just being too picky and maybe I won't find anything better. Ugh! I hate when I do this. I'm not going to settle. I'd rather be alone then be in a relationship that's lacking.

4 comments:

  1. You will find the right guy when he comes along and you will just know that you can spend the rest of your life with him and be content. Hang in there ... he is out there!

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  2. Hey girl, I saw you through my friend Christa's blog. Just wanted to let you know you're not alone! God has someone out there he is molding to be not perfect, but perfect for you! Just keep your head up and focus on yourself. From one single girl to another, he's out there, don't worry, just be happy with yourself and the timing will work out eventually. I know you've probably heard it all before (I have too) but it always helps to hear your not alone, at least for me!

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  3. I have been a silent stalker of your blog..but I agree w/the girls,there is someone out there for everyone. I was already married and divoreced w/3 children when my Mr.Right came into my life,he is 5yrs younger than me, weighs alot less than me,and childless. If we can come together and make it happen, anyone can. You just have to hang in there, and not settle for less or lower your own personal standards. Cathy from VA

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